Remember worf howling and screaming as he is fighting the strange aliens in some of his Holodeck fights?  Thankfully he is one to use the holodeck up to some of it’s potential (not to mention names Mr. Barkley).  You see worf fight aliens, his wife K’Ehleyr, and eventually goes on some interesting trips with his son Alexander to the holodeck.

Is the holodeck the place for a real warrior though?  Isn’t it the wussy place to hide from real battles?  If there is no possibility that your enemy can ultimately defeat you or hurt you, what is the point and where is the honor?

Let me give you 3 reasons why the holodeck IS a great place for klingons to battle:

• Worf honed his skills there.  Even though he wasn’t raised by Klingons or in ‘real Klingon battles’, he was always the victor against any Klingon he faced.
• The Danger Aspect – How many times did the holodeck safety precautions get turned off?  How many episodes revolved around holograms gone wild?  Worf and Alexander once had to defeat a group of Datas without the safeties on in the holodeck.
• In Star Trek: Voyager, the hunters used holograms to train and hunt.  They are considered one of the most fierce and deadly species in the Delta Quadrant, and even they found how deadly an opponent a hologram can be.

It’s pretty clear that a holodeck is a great way to learn to fight and improve your skills as a Klingon warrior or any warrior in general.  The problem, so far is that there isn’t a real holodeck out there….

Well that’s partly true.  Real Holograms is nearly finished with a hologram system that can be made at home.  Of course it’s not as advanced as the holodeck yet, but they will be releasing the info in plans/books in the next few months on how you can create your own holograms.  If you want to be one of the first to have dibs on the ‘How To’, they have a newsletter that is currently accepting people to get the release info.

You can request that here

What’s The Deal With Klingon Costumes?
You may have asked yourself, why don’t I have a Klingon costume yet?  You may or may not have bought your Klingon weapon of choice.  As far as the rest of the costume goes, what can be done to expedite the process of getting one?  Let’s look at the problems first:
#1 Cost – Depending on the quality of the costume, it may cost up to several thousand dollars to get a movie quality costume.
#2 Quality – High quality costumes aren’t sold on every street corner, less expensive ones are available at a few more locations.
#3. Your Confidence – Do you have what it takes to show up to the parties, conventions, etc wearing a Klingon costume?  Can you take the personality to the next level, and strut your honorable movements in front of your friends and strangers?

It all comes down to how much you want one.  Whether you want to buy one and add on to it with custom materials, or go for the epic one all the way, it really matters how much you want it.  If you do decide to get one, you’ll probably want to learn a few good Klingon words to impress those like-minded individuals.  When you are done with the costume for the day, make sure to keep it in a place of honor in your house.  If you place it for example, next to your hanging Bat’leth, it is ready and convenient for when you need it in a hurry.

Five ideas for places to wear your Klingon costume:
#1. Wearing it at a sci fi convention or for cosplay.  That is a great way to get plenty of compliments from knowledgeable folk.
#2. While shopping.  Think anyone will try and cut in line while you have the groceries?  Doubt it.
#3. At a Lions game (oh woops, they wouldn’t even see the costume with a bag over your head, sorry Lions fans)
#4. A day at the office, if you want to have an early day, recommend this for a Friday.
#5. Imagine this, someone breaks in your house and they see you in your full Klingon costume glory, you give them a Klingon war cry and then shoot them with a disruptor.

To see available Klingon Costumes, look at the page where we go into the current state of Klingon costumes here

This analyzes the occurrences of worm holes in Star Trek.  Worm holes are being conceived and theorized about in our present day society.  You would think they would have figured it out by the 24th century.  But apparently they are as rare then as they are now.  When a possible worm hole was discovered in The Next Generation, an auction was held and steep prices were offered for it’s use and control.  Later it was found to be another unstable worm hole, much to dangerous for use, leaving a Ferengi shuttle stranded.

In Deep Space Nine, the main storylines revolve around a ‘worm hole’ next to Bejor.  We learn however, that the ‘worm hole’ is called a worm hole because of what it does, not because of what it really is.  It is some composed of aliens that transport ships from one part of the universe to another.  It is nothing more then an organic transporter service, definitely not a worm hole in the scientific sense.  When Q’s son was aboard Voyager, he made a little space gateway that is similar to the properties of a worm hole.  Perhaps it just takes more brilliant minds to make a successful worm hole.

One humorous note is that although they can transport to other times and dimensions, traveling to another location through a worm hole is much harder feat.  If they create a Star Trek show based in the future, it would be great to see The Federation having conquered the worm hole problem, and able to go into other quadrants at will (how about a combined alliance of thousands of races invading Borg space?)

Here are the sci fi elements where they shall battle it out:
Battlestar Galactica: The damage control, marines, air tight ships, eating habits all give the edge to the Navy.  When the BSG team did research for the show, they went aboard a Naval Destroyer to learn about life on a ship.
Stargate SG-1: Run by the Air Force of today’s age, the advanced technology and living conditions definitely give the edge to the Air Force.
Star Trek: Naval ranks, jobs, overall policies and hierarchies are seen throughout the show.  The strict uniform policies and tight behinds seem to hold true to the Navy of today (which are based upon traditions from the 1700′s according to the Navy).
Star Wars: The clone troopers are similar to the Navy philosophy with their sailors.  Uniformity, following orders as slaves, regardless of their logic is something the Navy and Storm Troopers have engrained in their philosophies.  Everyone should dress the same and be like sheep, creativity is not encouraged.
But who wins…
The Navy definitely has more similarities to ships in space, having ships in the water that have similar dangers with fires, watertight/airtight measures, rank systems, food storage and preparation, living on ships, port visits and much more.  But the question was who should, not who would or will.  The Air Force would make this transition better, because they are much more acclimated with current technology, and implement higher standards of technology and living conditions (which would be important for attracting the high quality people that should be involved in the program).  A fleet of ships in space will be better off with a group of happy, creative people who are encouraged to succeed and an organization that supports them.  The Navy is much too stuck in their old pointless traditions to be trusted with such a task.  The Air Force is by no means perfect in all these areas, but they are leagues ahead of the Navy in most of the important areas.  There will be a steep learning curve in some areas, with trials, failures and more failures, but that is part of doing something great.  The navy can send a few of their consultants to help the Air Force in areas where the Navy has more experience.  The knowledge of the right-minded folk could get this process done much faster.  Also the Seals would definitely have a place in it (their name still works [SEa Air Land Space].

They may not using Klingon weapons or Bat’leths but Seals would add to any Sci Fi show and are quite awesome in real life too.

Phasers and photon torpedos from the Enterprise

Ship Weapons
#5. Phasers – From the original Star Trek to Voyager and the new movie, phasers have been the bread (while torpedoes the butter).  The main weapon for nearly all purposes, especially precision shots, is phasers.  They work great for storylines because they can do different damage as the situation dictates

#4. Photon/Quantum Torpedoes – Used less frequently then phasers (most likely to the fact that they use more resources then phasers), they have average damage and can be used for miscellaneous purposes such as homing and finding cloaked ships.

Enterprise firing torpedo

#3. Time Weapon – In the two-parter of Voyager (A Year of Hell), this weapon has a lot of time and energy put into every shot (no puns intended).  This weapon can effect thousands of years before and after, it can destroy entire planets and cultures.

#2. Borg Beam – Very powerful close range weapon that is able to take down many ships with little effort.

#1. Transphasient Torpedoes – Although only seen in the finale of Voyager, these things are bombad.  Able to destroy Borg cubes in one shot (before they can even start adapting), they are something hopefully we will see more of in the future.

Captain Kirk firing a Phaser

Handheld Weapons

#5. The Phaser- Very small and conceilable, gerat as a multi-purpose weapon.  With settings from stun to obliterate, this little weapon can destroy buildings.  It lacks a certain sleekness that some of the other weapons have.

#4. The Daq’tagh – This small knife is a great Klingon weapon.  The noticeable two side-blades that pop out make this one of the neater weapons in Star Trek.  It is a close up hand to hand weapon that requires skill to use.

#3. Sulu’s Sword – One of the cooler weapons in a while, this blade does Star Trek’s version of the lightsaber in it’s concealability.  You may even be able to get this through transporter costumes!  The axe that his opponent Romulans flipped out was also sweet looking

#2. Shield Charges (not technical name) – Drop one of these bad buys in an enclosed cavern or passage way on a ship, and they will stop your pursuers.  While perhaps not as strong as a level 10 force field, unless your opponent has highly powerful weapons, they won’t be able to get through.

Worf showing Gowron who the better warrior is

#1. Bat’leth – Oh yes, we finally arrive at a weapon synonymous with Star Trek and Klingon lore.  The Bat’leth is one of the finest concepts in the series, and used appropriately in a unique way from all other weapons.

Borg cubes in Voyager

It was the best of times, it was the worst of time traveling that got them into trouble in the first place. Voyager was lost in the Delta quadrant not the submissive Gamma quadrant, nor the politically motivated Alpha quadrant, certainly not the 4th mostly unanimous mystery quadrant. This is the fierce, highly technological, ever-warring Delta quadrant. There is one Klingon, one Vulcan (minus a couple minor storylines), and lots of Borg. The mighty Borg who take down entire races and galaxies, by sending hundreds of their mighty cubes to assimilate all who stand in their way. These same Borg who complain that they can’t conquer Earth despite sending two cubes over the course of 10 years (why wouldn’t they want to anyways?) For them it would take minutes to travel there (until Janeway blew up their space tunnels), but alas let’s move past that for now. Species 8472 was a disaster in Borg terms, who seem to add technological and all other ‘al’s’ to their collective. These highly smart billions of Borg, who have the brainpower of half the universe, were apparently outsmarted by a hologram Dr. using Borg’s own technology. When you used the Borg nano-probes to defeat species 8472′s ill-effects.

So what is up with that very silly quadrant? Seven of Nine spent seasons discovering her humanity, and fighting her Borg nature, she was built up as a sort of lone Borg who escaped the evil race (even though we have numerous examples of other drones becoming free and adapting to individuals much quicker with more ‘efficiency’.

The Borg don’t procreate all that much, they don’t sit in science labs, all they seem to do is regenerate and fix their ships when a much weaker vessels manages to outsmart them (like nearly every encounter with the Enterprise or Voyager). They still haven’t figured out how to put a condom on their assimilation tubes, as they have a nasty habit of getting ATD’s (assimiliatedly transmitted diseases). After fighting millions of ships over and over, they didn’t save the frequencies and have to re-adapt to each ship all over again? Just what do they plan on doing once they finish assimilating the entire universe anyways? Since they certainly don’t have hobbies…

Either way, Voyager certainly took us on a great adventure through the Delta quadrant, and even though there was only one Bat’leth, and mostly one Klingon to use it, we still learned a great deal about cultures from the Alpha quadrant as well. They did some good things like adding more holodecks (something many officers would have been petitioning for years earlier). Kess also had a hand in what they called ‘Airponics’, which in life today is something we call ‘Aeroponics’ (invented by NASA, basically the same thing).

Dr. & Borg in Voyager

What we really need to see is what happened in the end, they got home after being eaten by a Borg sphere (which 7 star ships couldn’t take down for some reason), and then Janeway basically says “we’ll talk about everything off camera”, and leaves the hardcore fans wanting a real ending. The future Janeway ceases to exist at this point, and we are left with an open timeline. Speaking of the timeline, if it was as easy to mess it up as they seem to do, their the Federation’s enemies would have destroyed them long ago. It would be great to see a newer Star Trek (bla the the show ‘Enterprise’, lame), where we get to see some cool things like the 29th century Borg, the Time ships that must have done quite a bit to stop Borg invasions through time, and other equally powerful enemies.

That about wraps this up, and I still want to know what the Borg are going to do if they assimilate the universe, play a game where they keep assimilating each other? There is no way to sustain their population without assimilating at their huge pace, their numbers are unsustainable without taking off those metal pieces (to become more attractive) and maybe ordering a couple books from Amazon on how to date other Borg.

How will you talk in your head when it happens? You stand before the high council, as they decide your fate. You dressed up in an elegant Klingon costume. Well good for you. You brought your traditional Bat’leth, even better. Yet instead of learning the language, you tried to use a Klingon translator on the go. You weren’t able to type fast enough, and in your hurry, you misspelled a word. Needless to say, the others at the convention were a little bit shocked at your lack of language master. What kind of warrior uses a Klingon translator in person? A Tagh you say? No you don’t because they took away your translator and you don’t even know what that means.

The lesson learned from this, is that despite having computer knowledge, an English to Klingon translator is not the best way to go around speaking. There are three fundamental problems with them:
#1. You have to have one with you at all times to use it effectively
#2. You won’t actually learn the language like you want to
#3. Most of them are incomplete or don’t provide all the words you need

What are some solutions? Make a better translator, if you are a programmer and know the langue ins and outs, you could do this. The problem with that is, if you knew the language that well, then this wouldn’t be an issue. Another half-hearted solution is to keep on using incomplete Klingon translators, but you know where that got you in the first place. The third solution is different, actually learning the Klingon language. There are many resources out there to help you learn this real living language. Developed by a language expert, it is something you can use to connect with others. The next time you see others, you may not look quite like a Klingon because the smile on your face. When you are speaking fluently, you may even become head of a house, or have a seat on the high council. Let’s face it, a Klingon translator is a fun toy, but if you are serious about being a Klingon of legend, then leave the translator back home on the pc where it belongs and check out these real page for learning Klingon

P.S. Those books and audios are pretty cheap, you may want to get a couple of them to see the different aspects of the language and culture.

Traditional Bat'leth

Batleth
The batleth is the weapon of choice for most Klingons today. Used by Klingon celebrities such as Worf, Gowron and Martok. Commonly used in honorable battles (seen in Star Trek The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine). The origination of the Batleth is from Kahless The Unforgettable. When used properly this sword acts as an extension of the users arms, a unique fighting style is derived from it. Of all the Klingon weapons, the batleth is the most feared throughout the Alpha Quadrant. We have seen young beginners start their combat training with the batleth (Worf’s son Alexander), so if this is your first Klingon weapon, make sure to use it with honor. The batleth has been used to kill many notable Klingons, such as when Worf used it to kill Duras for revenge.

Heavy Beserker Bat'leth

Heavy Beserker Bat’leth
For the warrior that only has two things on their to do list (killing and celebrating the kill). The Heavy Beserker Bat’leth is a great weapon to satisfy those bloodthirsty Klingon desires. Just remember to drink some blood wine after the battle. A large axe-looking weapon, this bat’leth is for the brute beast this is for real warriors to show their skills in combat. Only for use by real Klingon men.

Made by Kahless The Unforgettable

The Sword of Kahless
Not only the the most famous bat’leth, it’s the most famous weapon in Klingon history. This brought a future generation of batleths in it’s image. To speak on this weapon we have to talk about the story behind it. Kahless received the design for this sword in a dream, then dipped a strand of his hair in lava, cooled it in a lake, then twisted into the batleth. This sword is nearly as legendary as the man who made it. Kahless used the bat’leth to defeat the tyrant Molar. Sadly it was lost for thousands of years when stolen around the 5th century. Thankfully Worf, Kor and Jadzia Dax set out to find it. After fighting their way to the sword, they decided to beam it into space until the Klingon Empire was ready for it. Just make sure you keep this in a place of honor that it deserves when you get it.

When you decide which Bat’leth is right for you, read this article before you buy one:
How To Buy Klingon Weapons

There are a lot of reasons to buy Klingon weapons. Whether you are a collector, want to hang a Bat’leth on your wall, or are attending a convention, you will need to find the right way to buy your Klingon weapon.

The most accessible place to shop for one is the internet. Shopping online allows you to see the best options and prices. Most local stores will not carry weapons of the Klingon variety (too bad for them).

When I first started doing research on buying Klingon weapons I went to every site that I could find selling them, e-mailed most of the sites to find out more about their programs, and eventually decided on the best one to buy from.

Amazon has the best stock, as they work with sellers from other stores, they also have the most competitive prices on the internet.

There are four different Klingon weapons that they have for sale.

Traditional Bat'leth

#1 The traditional Bat’leth
They have very good prices and two sellers sell it. Available in 24″ and 48″. It sells on other sites up to twice as much.
Link to Bat’leth

Made by Kahless The Unforgettable

#2 The Sword of Kahless
They have two different sizes (48″ and 24″ inch). The large version is the most inexpensive of the full-sized bat’leths
Link to Sword of Kahless

Heavy Beserker Bat'leth

#3 Heavy Beserker Bat’leth
This item is more rare to find at most places
Link to Heavy Beserker Bat’leth

Shown here is Phoenix Blade (similar to Daqtagh)

#4 Similar to Daqtagh, the Phoenix Blade
They sell an unnofical blade that looks very close the Daq’tagh. It’s made in the same image and even includes the two side-blades that pop out!
Link to Phoenix Blade

When you get your weapon reply to this to let everyone know which one you got and how you like it.

-Bill Wayne